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The Talentless Hack
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email: Email
since: 06-11-05, id: 830987, Profile Updated: 02-13-08
country: United States
web: Homepage
Author has written 23 stories for Fullmetal Alchemist, Inuyasha, Rurouni Kenshin, Cowboy Bebop, and Peacemaker Kurogane.

Hm...what's there to say? I happen to believe the moniker speaks for itself. : ).
Interests: Inuyasha, Full Metal Alchemist, Rurouni Kenshin, for now. I have a Bonanza fetish that no one's supposed to know about, and I may indulge it at a later date. Homepage: clicking on the "homepage" link above will take you to my LJ account, where you will be informed of my progress (or lack thereof) on my fanfics. You may, however, have to suffer through a rant...or eight.

As for personal info, I'll be 23 next December, and I live in Florida, land of deluges and hurricanes. I'm also currently in college. I reserve the right to blame any inconsistencies in updating on this--you have been warned. As far as updating itself is concerned, that will depend on how quickly I get through editing. And because I am obscenely psychotic about my writing and happen to find assigned work as boring in college as it was in high school, I probably won't leave you guys in a lurch for long. Unless it's a term paper, or exams. Then, you're totally screwed.

As you can tell, I don't know when to shut up; expect this penchant in my writing. One more thing: I don't mind constructive criticism. Anonymous flames will be unceremoniously deleted and promptly forgotten; signed flames will be mocked and generally handled with extreme prejudice--let the records show I gave you fair warning.


An all-purpose disclaimer, should I neglect to place one in my stuff (and I probably will, absentminded as I am): I own nothing, not even my soul--that was signed over to the College Board during my sophomore year of high school.
August 30, 2006: In the mood for a good laugh? I direct you to this blog, by a personal favorite of mine, Dave Barry. And yes, that's exactly what it's like before every single hurricane. Which makes me laugh until I remember that I live here. Then I just cry.
The "saw-in-the-head" shot, as promised in Chapter 38 of Captain Miserable Finds the Greener Grass (just scroll down a tad: it's black and white and basically un-miss-able).
A Long Over-due Note:

The response to "Pieces" continues to amaze me. Sure, I hoped people would like it, but I was not prepared for how many of you actually would. As of this writing (03.27.06), it is on FOURTEEN favorites lists (and counting; people add it to their lists pretty often), has garnered eight reviews, and is a resident of three C2 communities. And all I can say is, but damn people, you sure know how to make a gal feel as talented as Shakespeare (I realize there are people who are going to take issue with this, but whatever, I'm feeling under the weather at the moment--just go with it). So this is just a note to say: you guys are awesome, and I appreciate all of you who've taken the time to review "Pieces" (and my other junk too, but "Pieces" is the one that surprised me the most); everyone who put it on their Favorites list/ C2s; and everyone who's read it and/or re-read it. You guys are the reason I keep posting stuff, and it means a lot to me that you like my stuff at least as much as I do, if not more (kinda doubt that though). Thanks again guys, and keep letting me know if I'm on the right track. : ).


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

1. Ugetsu Monogatari: Tales of Moonlight and Rain » reviews
AU, SaitouTokio. Takagi Tokio hasn’t been normal since the day she received a very unique gift from the Wolf god. Tired of being different, she wishes to be normal…Takagi Tokio is about to learn that she ought to be very careful what she wishes for.
Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,974 - Reviews: 13 - Updated: 12-25-08 - Published: 12-3-08
2. All The Small Things » reviews
A collection of drabbles set in the “Captain Mis” universe. Up: 32. Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better; 33. Memento; 34. Sexy; 35. Back to the Drawing Board; and 36. Ten More.
Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 36 - Words: 23,058 - Reviews: 66 - Updated: 11-27-08 - Published: 12-11-06
3. Stranger Things Have Happened reviews
Part 3 of 3. “This feeling that I get, This one last cigarette, As I lay awake & wait for you to come through that door. Oh maybe, maybe, maybe I can share it with you: I behave, I behave, I behave so I can share it with you.”
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,439 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 11-15-08 - Published: 11-15-08
4. A Smoke Will Fill the Air reviews
Part 2 of 3. “I can change, I can change, I can change, But who you want me to be? I’m the same, I’m the same, I’m the same, Who do you want me to be?”
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,057 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 11-15-08 - Published: 11-15-08
5. And I Dream About Somewhere reviews
Part 1 of 3, AU, SaitouTokio. “Goddamn this dusty room, This hazy afternoon; I’m breathing in this silence like never before…”
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,327 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 11-15-08 - Published: 11-15-08
6. Captain Miserable Finds the Greener Grass » reviews
AU, SaitouTokio, WIP. The oddball romance that almost never was. CH. 39: Fish and Visitors. Rated for language and situations.
Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 331,757 - Reviews: 314 - Updated: 7-31-08 - Published: 7-30-06
7. Domesticated » reviews
AU, SaitouTokio. You can take the wolf out of the wild, but you can't take the wild out of the wolf...or can you? A collection of shorts examining that question. No timeline. Rated K through T.
Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,568 - Reviews: 14 - Updated: 6-15-08 - Published: 12-24-07
8. Coffee reviews
one shot, AU, SaitouTokio. Place: a diner. Players: a waitress and a police inspector. Plot: what might have been. Go.
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,649 - Reviews: 10 - Updated: 3-31-08 - Published: 3-31-08
9. White Day reviews
one shot, AU, SaitouTokio. “He’s not scary looking,” Tokio said. Upon seeing the looks on her coworkers’ faces, she sighed: “Okay, fine, he’s a little scary looking.”
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,471 - Reviews: 22 - Updated: 3-13-08 - Published: 3-13-08
10. Happily Ever After reviews
one shot, “Capt Mis” verse, DARK. Real life has a nasty habit of ripping away our most cherished illusions. 2nd person POV, Saitoucentric.
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: M - English - General/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,276 - Reviews: 12 - Updated: 12-24-07 - Published: 12-24-07
11. Bushido reviews
[oneshot] “Because Bushido wasn’t a way of life, it was his life.”
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 889 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 9-10-07 - Published: 9-10-07
12. Guess Who's Coming to Dinner reviews
[one shot] In which Chou finds himself dining in the Wolf's den.
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,074 - Reviews: 16 - Updated: 4-19-07 - Published: 4-19-07
13. The Hijikata Toshizou Facts Game reviews
[one shot] There’s a new game making the rounds, and it centers on the “Demon Vice Commander,” Hijikata Toshizou. Oh this should be good…. As close to crack as I’ve gotten…SO FAR.
Complete - Peacemaker Kurogane - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,904 - Reviews: 15 - Updated: 10-31-06 - Published: 10-31-06
14. The Dead » reviews
[WIP] Gone, but never forgotten. 10 years after the recovery of the Shikon no Tama and the defeat of Naraku, Fate has one more task for Kagome to complete. Those of you expecting anything remotely fluffy are in the wrong place.
Inuyasha - Fiction Rated: M - English - General/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 126,143 - Reviews: 17 - Updated: 8-21-06 - Published: 8-20-05
15. Angels of Death reviews
[drabble] “He’s had a premonition of his death. But Vicious doesn’t mind.”
Complete - Cowboy Bebop - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 245 - Reviews: 5 - Updated: 8-9-06 - Published: 8-9-06
16. Blood reviews
[one shot] “I live with three truths: Aku Soku Zan, Gatotsu, and Blood.” Tokio on her husband's job. Set in the beginning of the Kyoto Arc. Rated T just in case.
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: T - English - General/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,431 - Reviews: 8 - Updated: 7-14-06 - Published: 7-14-06
17. The Pocketwatch reviews
[one shot] Time to put the past away.
Complete - Fullmetal Alchemist - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,405 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 6-18-06 - Published: 6-18-06
18. Best Night Ever reviews
[one shot] [AU] [AM] Being a working girl isn't all it's cracked up to be, but there are a few perks....
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,892 - Reviews: 12 - Updated: 6-13-06 - Published: 6-13-06
19. Gray reviews
[one shot] “He knew good was good and bad was bad…black was black and white was white. Except it wasn’t.”
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 617 - Reviews: 9 - Updated: 4-21-06 - Published: 4-21-06
20. Unforgiven reviews
[one shot] How do you explain sin to an innocent?
Complete - Fullmetal Alchemist - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,878 - Reviews: 3 - Updated: 12-24-05 - Published: 12-24-05
21. Home reviews
[one shot] Home can be a place to go back to. For the Elric brothers, “home” is people to go back to.
Complete - Fullmetal Alchemist - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 695 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 11-13-05 - Published: 11-13-05
22. Paradox reviews
[one shot] “It was simply absurd, really. So of course, in the grand scheme of things, it made perfect sense.” A look at opposites and the strange harmony that results when they fit.
Complete - Rurouni Kenshin - Fiction Rated: K+ - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 650 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 11-9-05 - Published: 11-9-05
23. Pieces reviews
[one shot] [EdWinry] Sometimes, you need someone else to fit all the ragged fragments of yourself together....
Complete - Fullmetal Alchemist - Fiction Rated: T - English - General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,237 - Reviews: 24 - Updated: 6-17-05 - Published: 6-17-05
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