OKay, so first of all, I am also stella turner, but I just decided to change my pen name.

My nicknames are: Tater-tot (don't ask, I don't even know) Alice Apple, Vampy, Icey, Biz, Stella, Zy, Z,Bookworm, "Hey, Weirdo!"

Age: 12, but I don't seem like it.

Height: 5,4"??

Appearance: Brown eyes, dirty blonde hair; currently dyed brown, and huge feet. (They're size 8-9)

Other people find this weird, but I am actually strong for my age, I am a girl who likes sports and actually likes watching hockey. (No, not because I'm half Canadian) I am a girl who actually eats and doesn't care about her weight - I don't even own a scale. I am kinda' emo.

I also have a dad that needs anger management badly, and drinks, and smokes. So that is sometimes the reason for not updating. feel free to PM me anytime to ask for beta-ing or just to talk about random stuff. I'll usually reply as soon as I see it.

Please oh please oh please oh please oh please oh please (etc.) read and review my stories! I love reading reviews and do little happy dances every time I get so much as one! I will also most likely reply to each review, unless, of xourse, my family is being pushy and I am forced to get off. . .

Effective Ways On How To Annoy/Scare/Weird Out The Living Daylights Outta People (on elevators, in computer labs, etc.) (as seen in all-hail-the-jello's profile)

1. Repeat everything the person says in a question.
2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World." incessantly.
3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
4. Offer nametags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, and then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh no, not now, not motion sickness!"
11. Meow occasionally
12. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
13. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
17. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
18. Say, "I wonder what all these do." and push the red buttons.
19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
23. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on.
25. Ask every passenger that goes up if you can press the button for them.
26. Log on to a computer, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream: "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
27. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
28. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the dang thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes, turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.
29. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly.
30. Bring a chain saw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously.
31. Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes.
32. If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.
33. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, and then when it's all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.
34. Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.
35. Send e-mails constantly to the person next to you.
36. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
37. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
38. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
39. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
40. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
41. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
42. Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
43. Swat at flies that don't exist.
44. Dance, while drumming noisily against the walls.

1. Find a globe. Spin it. What does it say? i don't have a globe. . .#pouts# hmm. . . #little lightbulb appeares over head# flip a candy!! haha!

2. Find a book. Turn to page 56, line 18, word 6. it's blank. . .

3. What can you hear right now? an awsome random song that i love!! (My Chemical Romance song, Dead! it's awsome!)

4. Have a conversation with the closest living thing to you other than yourself. Me can i eat you? Brother: NO! Me: i wasn't talking to you! Bother: then who were you talking to? hmm?? Me: my candy. . . . . Brother:you're crazy! Me: i know. (oh right. it said LIVING thing. . . )

5. Turn on T.V. What show is on? the US presidential elections thingy. . .

6. Type your name with your elbow. zxhfdbxznjb nsd (i kept typing it perfectly and i don't want anyone to know my real name, so i just hit random keys. . . )

7. Stand up. Close your eyes. Spin around three times. Stop. Open your eyes.What's the first thing you see? the floor (i tripped on the rug and fell. . . )

8. If you could be any cereal mascot, who would you be? umm. . . . i dunno. cereal mascots are all so single-minded and boring. how many times will it take Lucky the Leprechaun to actually tie up the kids to a tree, take a plane to another country on the other side of the world, and change his name?? it really gets on my nerves sometimes how dumb they can be. . . just leave the leprechaun alone already!! gah!!

9. What happened last time you were typing on this computer? i had a hot chocolate, 4 butterscotch candies, and 6 packs of smarties. . . (i was on for a really long time. . . . 2 hours)

10. Find the third letter of all your answers. Underline them. What do they spell? osacehe

enjoy the stories!! i may not update all the time, so please be patient.

If you hate stereotypes and think people should just shut up and stop POST THIS. Pick the stereotype(s) that fits you.

I'm a GYMNAST, therefore I MUST be a whore.

I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.

I HAVE GAY FRIENDS, so I must be GAY TOO.

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.

I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.

I'm WHITE and have black friends, so I MUST think I'm black.

I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over-controlling and a bitch.

I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.

I draw ANIME, so I MUST be a freak.

I am a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.

I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak.

I am AMERICAN, so I MUST be an obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.

I'm WELSH, so I MUST love sheep

I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.

I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.

I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST be a beer drinking hockey player.

I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.

I am QUIET and POLITE, so I MUST be a pushover.

I use GOOD GRAMMAR, so I MUST be a snob.

I prefer FANTASY and SCI-FI, so I MUST be out of touch with reality.

I love TO LEARN so I MUST be boring.

I'm WHITE, so I MUST be a racist.

I'm good with COMPUTERS, so I MUST be a nerd/geek.

I am a GIRL, so boys MUST be better than me at sports.

I am a GIRL, so I MUST only be good at work.

I am WHITE and I like to DANCE, so I MUST be lame

I am SKINNY, so I MUST be sensitive about my weight.

I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST go to church every Sunday.

I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST not do anything on Halloween.

I am POOR, so I MUST not have good hygiene.

I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser

I like READING, so I MUST be a Loner.

I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.

I SPOT AND CORRECT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.

I like to listen to CHRISTIAN MUSIC, so I MUST hate metal rock and people who listen to it.

I like to READ, so I MUST do nothing except read.

I don't agree with CONFORMING, so I MUST act all freaky and be loud.

I'm a GIRL, so I MUST like to talk about crushes, dolls, not getting my clothes dirty, and parties.

I DON'T want to date until I reach driving age, so I MUST be brainwashed by my parents.

I don't STUDY much but still get STRAIGHT A's, so I MUST be cheating.

I don't think VEGETARIANISM makes sense, so I MUST think all vegetarians are hippies.

I'm easily ANNOYED, so I MUST be bratty.

I'm a HUMAN, so I MUST be labeled.

I LISTEN TO ROCK MUSIC, so I MUST be a rebel.

I'm a GIRL, so I MUST love cute/fuzzy animals.

I'm a GYMNAST, therefore I MUST be a whore.

I don't buy DESIGNER CLOTHES, therefore I MUST be poor.

My parents are DIVORCED, therefore I MUST be mentally unstable.

I grew up with a SMOKER/ALCOHOLIC/DRUG ADDICT, therefore I MUST be one myself.

I'm FROM THE SOUTH, so I MUST have a southern drawl.

I'm A MIDDLE CHILD, so I MUST be seeking attention.

If you hate stereotypes and think people should just shut up and stop, POST THIs.

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager

YOUR GUY SIDE:

x You love hoodies.
x You love jeans.
x Dogs are better than cats.
x It's hilarious when people get hurt.
x You've played with/against boys on a team.
x Shopping is torture.
x Sad movies suck. (I watched a movie that was suposed to be sad with my friend, and we ended up making fun of EVERONE!)
You own/ed an X-Box.
x Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
x At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
x You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
x You watch sports on TV.
x Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice. (my dad's and alchoholic/ smoker, so no way)
x You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
x Baggy pants are cool to wear.
x It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
x Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
x You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
x Sports are fun.
x Talk with food in your mouth.
x Sleep with your socks on at night--sometimes

TOTAL: 20 (Wow, that just confirms what I know...)

YOUR GIRL SIDE:

x You wear lip gloss/chapstick.
You love to shop.
x You wear eyeliner. (only black, though. . . )
You wear the color pink
x Go to your mom for advice. (only in dire need. . . shudder)
You consider cheerleading a sport.
You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
x You like wearing jewelry. (mostly black and red earrings. . .that's all)
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
x You don't like the movie Star Wars.
x You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
x You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes. (I have a grand total of four)
x You care about what you look like. (only on certain occasions)
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
x You love the movies. (just something to fill up extra time)
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
x Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it. (i did this while my friend was sleeping; a curly mustache, unibrow, and weird nerdy glasses (you know the kind harry potter wears??)
Like being the star of every thing.

TOTAL: 10 (It's official...I am a tomboy...you wouldn't know it if you saw me, but i totally am. though i don't look it most of the time. . .)